Child of God

It was a weekly thing.  My mom said it would give me some responsibilities and work ethic for when I got older.  I was thinking it would give me a couple dollars in my pocket for when I go to the store to buy goodies.  I started out looking forward to Wednesdays.  My mom would go to her women’s meeting and I would go into the office and help clean and tidy it up.  I would wipe down shelves and the desk and sweep and mop the floor.  By the time I was done, you would smell the sweet hint of lavender and pine.  Considering how much I hated cleaning at home, I thought I did an excellent job.  When he saw my work, he would tell my mom, “Sista Smith, your daughter is a hard worker.  Thank you for allowing her to do the Lord’s work and help me out every week.“

He would tell me that I was one of God’s angels sent down from heaven, and I felt important.  He said that God had these angels in heaven but he had a few that he would send down to earth to do special jobs.  My helping to clean his office in the church every week was what God wanted me to do.  He asked me if I wanted to do more to please God and be on his good side.  I was thinking sure, because I could always use more dollars to buy my favorite sweets and who wouldn’t want to be on God’s good side? 

Normally he wouldn’t be in his office while I was cleaning but, about a month after I had been working for Pastor, he decided to stick around one Wednesday.  He sat behind his desk watching me climb the stepladder to wipe down the shelves.  It was kinda creepy.  I felt like I was being watched by one of those cat clocks with the eyes and tail that wag back and forth, watching every move I made in the room.  When it came time to clean his desk, I thought he would get up and move but he didn’t.  Well, he did for a second when he went to close and lock the door.  Then he walked back over and sat behind his desk. 

Pastor said “Nikki, I told you that God has special jobs for his angels on earth.  If you do what God asks of you, you will have a seat right next to him when you get to heaven.”  I was worried because I couldn’t think of what else he could possibly want me to clean in the office.  I was praying it wouldn’t be the windows because I hate doing those.

 

While trying to clean the desk off and organize his papers, I felt his hands on my waist.  He grabbed me and picked me up to sit on his lap.  He said, “You want to do God’s work don’t you?  You want a seat in heaven?”  I told him yes.  I knew I had done some bad things before and I didn’t want them to keep me out of heaven.  Like the time I kicked the ball and it hit Emelia Johnson in the face so hard her glasses broke.  I had even taken a pack of my brother’s Now N Laters, and hid them so he would never find them.  Then when I thought he forgot about them I mixed them in with my goodies so he would think they were mine.  He didn’t need more cavities anyway. 

Pastor said, “Good!”  He said, “I will show you how you can please me and God all at the same time.  And what I show you has to stay between us because God doesn’t like people telling everyone about the special jobs he has them doing.” I asked if I could tell my mom or my brother since they were family but he said no.  He said if I did, God would be very upset and he might do something to hurt one of the people I love.  I was 8 years old when I learned how to please Pastor and God using my hands.  He zipped down his pants and took my hand and placed it inside.  At first he moved my hand back and forth because I didn’t really know what I was supposed to do.  I wasn’t sure what was happening because he said I was pleasing him but he made these weird noises like I was doing something wrong.  After a few weeks, he didn’t have to hold my hand anymore.  I figured out everything I needed to do.  I was 10 years old when I learned to please pastor and God using my mouth.  By the time I was 12 I learned how to please him lying on my back.  I never told anyone anything because Pastor said I was doing what God wanted me to do.  I didn’t want him to hurt my family.  And like my mom said, it would give me some responsibility and work ethic for when I got older.